You command me to love the Lord God with all my heart, with all my soul, with all my strength and to love my neighbour as I love myself (Luke 10:27; Deuteronomy 6:5). You show me the way to love as you love - you died on the cross to win a redemption for me and all those who believe in You. Your love is self-sacrificial, perfect love.
So it is that I am exhorted to love like You, to give my all, no matter the pain, the betrayal by the people I love, the prejudices, the ridicule that I have to go through. I am struggling Lord to be what You want me to be, to discern and obey Your will in my life, to please You in the things I do, but You know how often I stumble, how frequent I fall. Through it all Lord, You have always been there for me. You have always been faithful and not allow me to be tempted beyond my strength and with the trial, You provide me with a way out, so that I may be able to bear it. (1 Cor 10:13). You teach me forgiveness and when I find it difficult to forgive, You give me Your strength. You forgive me each time I say sorry. You pick me up, You heal my wounds. You give me wisdom and understanding to know where I have gone wrong and let those lessons in life teach me to become a better person, and my prayer is for me to become a daughter who would make You proud. My prayer is that when You take me from this world, You take me at a time when I am most holy, and I'd like to hear You say, "You have competed well; You have finished the race; You have kept the faith. From now on the crown of righteousness awaits you" (2 Timothy 4:7-8). Such is my hope Lord, and You promise such hope will not disappoint (Romans 5:5) and it gives me immense joy.
Dear Lord, how trying it is to love as You love in these months. Excruciatingly difficult, Lord. I've been banned from saying "Allah Taala". I have pain, Lord, deep pain in my heart. Forbidding me from calling the Almighty "Allah Taala" is like cutting off my limbs. The very first hymn I learnt when I was a young girl of six years was "Bisi siku Allah Taala, Iya ti ngaga dunya..".and the very first prayer to profess my faith in Iban was 'Aku arapka Allah Taala, Apai ti besai kuasa.." And I've been calling God Allah Taala long before the Bible in the Indonesian language came to Malaysia. And now Lord, as I approach middle age, I have been forbidden from calling my Heavenly Father by His name, Allah Taala, because others claim only they have the absolute right to address the Lord God as Allah.
Lord, You want us to know the truth about God. I've been trying Lord, for indeed what St Augustine said is true, my heart is restless, until it rests in Thee. And the God that I know and believe in is a God of love. He loves all mankind - Christians, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, Jewish, white, yellow, black - He makes the sun rise on the bad and the good, and causes rain to fall on the just and unjust (Mathew 5:45). The God that I know is forgiving, and He wants me to be forgiving like Him "Be perfect, just as your Heavenly Father is perfect" (Mathew 5:48). The God that I know is holy, so He wants me to be holy.(1 Peter 1:16). He gives me the golden rule to regulate my relationship with others, which is to do to others whatever I would want others to do to me (Mathew 7:12). He wants me to be compassionate and humble (Mathew 18:4). He tells me not to return evil for evil or insult for insult, but on the contrary, a blessing, that I might inherit a blessing (1 Peter 8-9). As much as He is a God of mercy and love, so is He a God of justice, so I fear Him, for He can destroy both soul and body (Mathew 10:28). God is real to me, real in my soul.
Lord Jesus, I believe that You are the Son of God, the 2nd Person of the Holy Trinity, You are my Saviour, the promised of the prophets, the fullness of God's revelation. You are the Word of God, Who become flesh and dwell among us. (John 1:1-14). We sin and our rebellion distanced us from God, and out of His great love for us, God sent You his only begotten Son to the world, Your blood is the expiation of our sin and reconcile our broken relationship with God (Rom 5:9-10). Through You, the promise by God to bless the descendants of Abraham our father in faith is fulfilled, for the blessing is given through baptism of believers all over the world (Galatians 3:14). So they say You are just a prophet, You are just a man and not Divine, You didn't die on the cross, they say You were substituted by someone else. As my daughter Daphne pointed out, the Bible said the chief priests bribed the soldiers to lie - to say that You had been taken by Your disciples and the story has circulated .. to the present day (Mathew 28:11-15). We believe that You will come again to judge the living and the dead and all dominions, powers, principalities will acknowledge You as the Saviour, Lord and King. And our Muslim brothers also believe that at the end of the world, You, Lord Jesus, will come to judge mankind and that You will rule for 40 years. Indeed Lord, it is precisely because You are Divine that You have the power to judge mankind. Indeed Lord, there is no salvation through anyone else, nor is there any other name under heaven given to the human race by which we are to be saved, except by Your name Lord. (Acts 4:12).
Lord I believe in the Holy Spirit, the Advocate and Teacher, Who leads me to all truths, who reminds me of your teachings (John 14:26), who convicts me of my sin, so that I know where I have erred and seek mercy. The Holy Spirit who dwells in us believers bears fruits - the gift of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22). True, non-believers cannot accept the Spirit of Truth, because the world neither sees nor knows it. But to all who believe, we know it, because it remain with us and in us (John 14:17). Yes Lord, through the pouring of Your Spirit on us believers, we are the sons and daughters who prophesy, we are the old men who dream, we are the young men who see visions. (Joel 3:1).
O Lord God, You make Your covenant with us, and You place Your laws within us, You write Your laws in our hearts and You are our God, and we Your people (Jeremiah 31:33). You want me to be obedient to the faith (Romans 1:5). Offerings and sacrifices You do not require, what You want is a broken spirit and a repentant heart. (Psalm 51:18-19). What You want from me is the circumcision of my heart (Romans 2:29), for You judge my heart (1 Sam 16:7).
What I feel for Thee is real, You fill my innermost being, the love that You pour in my heart through the Holy Spirit (Romans 5:5) moves me to love as You love. Thus it pains me Lord when men, with our imperfections and who fall short of Your glory (Romans 3:23), not only judge my faith and what I believe in as one falsehood but deign to prescribe as law how I worship You. Even You Lord God, give me free will. You alone are my judge, for You are God the Almighty, You alone are Perfect, You are the Holy, Immortal One.
Lord, send forth Your Spirit of Truth and let this Spirit prove to the powers that be how wrong they are about sin, righteousness and judgment (John 16:8-11). Lord, raise up righteous leaders for this nation, leaders after Your own heart. Lord, help Your disciples to be steadfast in our faith, hope and love in You. Give us the grace Lord, to forgive those who hurt us.
And Lord I pray for golden peace, peace all over the land
may all men dwell in liberty, walking hand in hand
banish fear and ignorance, hunger thirst and pain
banish hate and poverty, let no man live in vain.
Keep all men for ever one, one in love and grace
wipe away all war and strife, give freedom to each race
Let your justice reign supreme
and righteousness be done
let goodness rule the hearts of men
and evil be overcome.
In Your Precious Name Lord, I pray, Amen.
In nomine Patris, et Filius, et Spiritu Sancti, Amen.
So it is that I am exhorted to love like You, to give my all, no matter the pain, the betrayal by the people I love, the prejudices, the ridicule that I have to go through. I am struggling Lord to be what You want me to be, to discern and obey Your will in my life, to please You in the things I do, but You know how often I stumble, how frequent I fall. Through it all Lord, You have always been there for me. You have always been faithful and not allow me to be tempted beyond my strength and with the trial, You provide me with a way out, so that I may be able to bear it. (1 Cor 10:13). You teach me forgiveness and when I find it difficult to forgive, You give me Your strength. You forgive me each time I say sorry. You pick me up, You heal my wounds. You give me wisdom and understanding to know where I have gone wrong and let those lessons in life teach me to become a better person, and my prayer is for me to become a daughter who would make You proud. My prayer is that when You take me from this world, You take me at a time when I am most holy, and I'd like to hear You say, "You have competed well; You have finished the race; You have kept the faith. From now on the crown of righteousness awaits you" (2 Timothy 4:7-8). Such is my hope Lord, and You promise such hope will not disappoint (Romans 5:5) and it gives me immense joy.
Dear Lord, how trying it is to love as You love in these months. Excruciatingly difficult, Lord. I've been banned from saying "Allah Taala". I have pain, Lord, deep pain in my heart. Forbidding me from calling the Almighty "Allah Taala" is like cutting off my limbs. The very first hymn I learnt when I was a young girl of six years was "Bisi siku Allah Taala, Iya ti ngaga dunya..".and the very first prayer to profess my faith in Iban was 'Aku arapka Allah Taala, Apai ti besai kuasa.." And I've been calling God Allah Taala long before the Bible in the Indonesian language came to Malaysia. And now Lord, as I approach middle age, I have been forbidden from calling my Heavenly Father by His name, Allah Taala, because others claim only they have the absolute right to address the Lord God as Allah.
Lord, You want us to know the truth about God. I've been trying Lord, for indeed what St Augustine said is true, my heart is restless, until it rests in Thee. And the God that I know and believe in is a God of love. He loves all mankind - Christians, Muslims, Hindus, Buddhists, Jewish, white, yellow, black - He makes the sun rise on the bad and the good, and causes rain to fall on the just and unjust (Mathew 5:45). The God that I know is forgiving, and He wants me to be forgiving like Him "Be perfect, just as your Heavenly Father is perfect" (Mathew 5:48). The God that I know is holy, so He wants me to be holy.(1 Peter 1:16). He gives me the golden rule to regulate my relationship with others, which is to do to others whatever I would want others to do to me (Mathew 7:12). He wants me to be compassionate and humble (Mathew 18:4). He tells me not to return evil for evil or insult for insult, but on the contrary, a blessing, that I might inherit a blessing (1 Peter 8-9). As much as He is a God of mercy and love, so is He a God of justice, so I fear Him, for He can destroy both soul and body (Mathew 10:28). God is real to me, real in my soul.
Lord Jesus, I believe that You are the Son of God, the 2nd Person of the Holy Trinity, You are my Saviour, the promised of the prophets, the fullness of God's revelation. You are the Word of God, Who become flesh and dwell among us. (John 1:1-14). We sin and our rebellion distanced us from God, and out of His great love for us, God sent You his only begotten Son to the world, Your blood is the expiation of our sin and reconcile our broken relationship with God (Rom 5:9-10). Through You, the promise by God to bless the descendants of Abraham our father in faith is fulfilled, for the blessing is given through baptism of believers all over the world (Galatians 3:14). So they say You are just a prophet, You are just a man and not Divine, You didn't die on the cross, they say You were substituted by someone else. As my daughter Daphne pointed out, the Bible said the chief priests bribed the soldiers to lie - to say that You had been taken by Your disciples and the story has circulated .. to the present day (Mathew 28:11-15). We believe that You will come again to judge the living and the dead and all dominions, powers, principalities will acknowledge You as the Saviour, Lord and King. And our Muslim brothers also believe that at the end of the world, You, Lord Jesus, will come to judge mankind and that You will rule for 40 years. Indeed Lord, it is precisely because You are Divine that You have the power to judge mankind. Indeed Lord, there is no salvation through anyone else, nor is there any other name under heaven given to the human race by which we are to be saved, except by Your name Lord. (Acts 4:12).
Lord I believe in the Holy Spirit, the Advocate and Teacher, Who leads me to all truths, who reminds me of your teachings (John 14:26), who convicts me of my sin, so that I know where I have erred and seek mercy. The Holy Spirit who dwells in us believers bears fruits - the gift of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22). True, non-believers cannot accept the Spirit of Truth, because the world neither sees nor knows it. But to all who believe, we know it, because it remain with us and in us (John 14:17). Yes Lord, through the pouring of Your Spirit on us believers, we are the sons and daughters who prophesy, we are the old men who dream, we are the young men who see visions. (Joel 3:1).
O Lord God, You make Your covenant with us, and You place Your laws within us, You write Your laws in our hearts and You are our God, and we Your people (Jeremiah 31:33). You want me to be obedient to the faith (Romans 1:5). Offerings and sacrifices You do not require, what You want is a broken spirit and a repentant heart. (Psalm 51:18-19). What You want from me is the circumcision of my heart (Romans 2:29), for You judge my heart (1 Sam 16:7).
What I feel for Thee is real, You fill my innermost being, the love that You pour in my heart through the Holy Spirit (Romans 5:5) moves me to love as You love. Thus it pains me Lord when men, with our imperfections and who fall short of Your glory (Romans 3:23), not only judge my faith and what I believe in as one falsehood but deign to prescribe as law how I worship You. Even You Lord God, give me free will. You alone are my judge, for You are God the Almighty, You alone are Perfect, You are the Holy, Immortal One.
Lord, send forth Your Spirit of Truth and let this Spirit prove to the powers that be how wrong they are about sin, righteousness and judgment (John 16:8-11). Lord, raise up righteous leaders for this nation, leaders after Your own heart. Lord, help Your disciples to be steadfast in our faith, hope and love in You. Give us the grace Lord, to forgive those who hurt us.
And Lord I pray for golden peace, peace all over the land
may all men dwell in liberty, walking hand in hand
banish fear and ignorance, hunger thirst and pain
banish hate and poverty, let no man live in vain.
Keep all men for ever one, one in love and grace
wipe away all war and strife, give freedom to each race
Let your justice reign supreme
and righteousness be done
let goodness rule the hearts of men
and evil be overcome.
In Your Precious Name Lord, I pray, Amen.
In nomine Patris, et Filius, et Spiritu Sancti, Amen.
2 comments:
Penguji, Aunty. Isu tu muka mata kitai amat, ngasoh kitai kering agi. Mayoh orang enda berani ngaku diri Kristin benong isu tu panas ba Malaysia... amat ko jako dalam bup kudus madah ka, one day kitai enda ngaku ngelala Allah Taala agi.
It's really sad. :-(
Ia endu Flo, arapka kitai Kristin sama kering agi meh. Enti bala malu ka diri Kristin ketegal pengarap dikemaruhka urang, kasih amat meh nya.
Sama besampi kitai, laban Allah Taala besemaya deka ningaka sebana semua nembiak iya ke dituntung penusah lalu Iya deka ngelepaska kitai.
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